Saturday, May 1, 2010

Crying yourself to sleep

Things I did before I cried myself to sleep:
I went to the reconstructive doctor (almost cried there)
Did a lot of hobbling on my crutches to get my little princess a doll for her post-birthday party...
me leg was hurting, incredibly swollen...the skin was stretching my stitches...
my heart was hurting, tired, and overwhelmed due to a lot of other things going on, my leg, all the things...I think my leg hurt, but my heart hurt even more...
I don't remember when I fell asleep....I just remember crying and tears rolling down the side of my face.
I'm telling you this, not for sympathy, (because everytime I post something about my leg, some people who don't really know me very well, post things like I'm just trying to get sympathy. BUt I'm human, and we all hurt and I hope that I might encourage someone who's going through the same thing)....I'm telling you this, for all those hearts that cried themselves to sleep last night, or tonight, or will in the future.

It was a release. The bathtub in my heart was filled with water, and just one more drop of sadness, made it overflow, out my eyes! And I know that at sometime all of you have had your "heart-tubs" overflow too. It feels good to release the pressure in your heart. And sometimes God gives you some "heavenly" sleep, where you get a vacation from your worries or heartaches.

then my friend Elena, sent me one of the most amazing things I've ever
if you ever feel discouraged, sad, or like giving up...please watch this AMAZING video!
Tears rolled down my face as I watched him say, "he may never be able to hold his wife, but he doesn't need hands to hold her heart" gives me goosebumps just typing it.

Please watch and be encouraged, and if you are having one of those, "cry yourself to sleep nights", please know I wish I could be there to hold you and tell you it will be okay, and to wipe away each one of your precious tears. If you fall asleep with your hands clasped in prayer for a better morning, know that I've spent nights like that too!
may your night be sweet and your day be even sweeter, typed with love, your kandee


Eden Angel said...

Thanks for bringing this up, Kandee, and I'm sorry that you were sad *hugs*

I've seen that video before and I think everyone needs to watch it! When I first saw it, I felt so selfish for being sad/ angry over little things. I also felt so grateful that I have so many blessings from God that I never thanked Him for. Having all my limbs for example! And I felt really inspired too. Thanks for reminding me of my blessings.

Pouring the love out of my heart-tub to you xx

agnieszka said...

i dont know what else i could say ...other than thank you...

i am currently sad too..doubting many of us women do at times...worring about to fat to small...or what so ever and than you read or watch something like this.. and it reminds you that there are so many other things in life that really matter and that you should be thankful for...

so thank you for reminding me that life has so much to offer and to be thankful for...

i hope you will find back to your smile soon... ;)

oxox aggy

Sophie said...

Aww, I feel for you so much and am sending you my best love and wishes that you feel happier soon. You really are such a nice genuine person and you are so thoughtful to everyone and everything else that is going on in this world. You are not selfish at all and I love that about you. xx

Ash. said...

you have probably heard this many, many times before, but you are such an inspiration. it's a relief knowing that someone so beautiful, someone who looks so happy, actually goes through rough and hurtfull times in their life too. when you write about these things it makes me happy to know that there are others who feel and think in those ways too. just by saying the little bit that you do, it helps. it helps make so many people feel better about a situation they may be in. you have such an impact on people. whether it's giving them hope or giving them the comfort of knowing that someone else is feeling the same way as them, you always help. you show that there is an easier way out, a brighter side, a better way of looking at things. i guess all i wanted to say is thank you, because i know that every time i read your blog, there is always something that makes me feel that little bit more better about the world inside. there is always something that makes me motivated and makes me look at things from another point of view. you are amazing, and what you do is incredible. you made me think, and realize that just by saying a few words to someone, you can change things and just by even giving someone a small compliment could help them get through the day. i know that i don't only speak for myself, but i speak for so many others that you give hope to every day as well. i don't think any of us can thank you enough for your helpful, sweet and inspiring words that often help us get through the day. you teach people to feel beautiful just the way they are, you make people feel loved, you give them hope for better days and show that things will get better in time, you show people how to truly be happy with life. keep doing what you're doing, because you are making a difference, you are turning peoples lives the right way up, you are making people happy. i hope you and your leg get better soon and i wish you the very best, because you deserve nothing less than that. you are a truly amazing person kandee, there needs to be more people in the world like you.
big hugs and thank yous. xoxox
- ash.

Tiffany said...

hey kandee i've been subscribed to you for a while and i love your vids/blogs! i never really commented but i just want you to know that i know exactly how you feel!! i had an accident this last october, where i fell out of a moving car and i was wearing skirt at that time! luckily, i only hurt my right leg. the first & 2nd of skin on the front of my leg was ripped off and i had a big gash on my ankle. it was like a crater on the inside of my ankle. i was on crutches for 3 weeks and i thought i had ripped the tendon near my ankle but thank goodness everything turned out okay.

the first week was HELL. every time i moved my leg all the blood would rush down and it was so painful!! i felt so helpless and depressed. i can't imagine being in that much pain ever again & i'm so sorry that you are in the same position. now i have a huge scar, HUGE, but at least i can cover it with make up. thank godness for make up, right? =)

i don't really know where i'm going with my message, but i just want you to know, that i know exactly how you feel and that i've felt the exact same pain that you're feeling right now. but i always tell myself, that it could have been worse and i always try to be thankful that i'm still alive and at least it was only my leg. i could have scraped my whole face or even died. but anyhow, i hope you recover quickly and i hope that you somewhat better after reading this.

your fan,

Loud Melody said...

Get well soon Candy Kandee. I'm sending you positive thoughts! :)

paige said...

that video was beautiful! i couldn't hold back the tears!

i know what you mean about having your heart-tub overflow lol. sometimes everything builds up and you just need a good cry.

i hope you feel better :)

vs said...

oh i love that man... this is one of the best videos of him, take a look!!! makes me cry every time: :)

hugs to you kandee! if i could hold you when you cry to sleep, i would too!!!!!

Noelle Garnier said...

What both of you said was so poignant! I hope that I can offer this kind of encouragement to all of my friends ... one of my best friends and I have gone through some terribly difficult times and I am always trying to find the best way to encourage her ... I will definitely send this video on because I know it will bless her so much! Thank you from the bottom of my heart, Kandee!
xoxo and blessings,
kandee fam lil sis

Ilo said...

Thanks kandee i've never seen this video, this guy is amazing ! No arms no leg but a beautiful souuuul and that's important !
We should be thankful and accept ourselves how we are so many people are complaining about being fat,short,skinny(including myself) but the importance is to BE HERE and doing something good in your life...

Wish you the best take care of you and keep the distance with glasses (I broke my nose 4 years ago with them ;)


charliet91 said...

my heart tub has been overflowing for the past couple of days,quite a few rough patches have come upon my path and now watching that video makes me realise that I should look for the positive in every situation,so thank you Kandee for sharing your stories,and for sharing that video

Salina said...

Thank you for posting this Kandee :)

Anonymous said...

aww that video actually made me cry! He's such an inspiration!

& im sorry that were sad :( Think positive :) <3 xx

What he ate, what I ate. said...

First he made me laugh, then he made me cry. Great video!

Dede said...

Today, in Italy, is the workers's day.
Each year, every square,
held festivals, concerts,and families are picnicking in the park ... but this year everything will be different ...
the crisis has affected many of us, our government cares about hiding his face behind a mask that smiles and says everything is fine when in fact it does everything sucks.
young people of my country do not know what to expect ... I'm one of them ... I am fighting for my future .. I'm at last year at the University ... modern litterature. .. I'm 22 years ...
my boyfriend is 22 has been working since he was 18 with a family where only the father works,a sister who does not want to do anything in his life and a sick mother ...
But despite all this ... I want to see my future ... I want to continue to fight for what I believe ... and my dreams ...
nothing comes from the sky...we have to try hard to keep it!

Thank you, because your happiness and your smile always make us stronger...
Now,you are sad,and we MUST help you,with our smile, remember that whoever follows you will not abandon you ... YOU ARE ONE GREAT PERSON, A GREAT WOMAN AND A GREAT MOTHER ...

ps: I'll start a course in October by make up artist ... because we MUST follow our dreams!!!
a lot of kisses to you and your kids...take care...your italian subby.

FaithHopeLove said...

kandee, BIG hugs!!!! i have seen this video before, every time I see it again, I am re inspired, it is so powerful. You and this blog are so powerful and so helpful to so many, sharing your love - your strength - your hope - your words, your life - your support - your "its gonna be ok" its all the same, sharing ....i have had those nights you speak of in my lifetime, and i feel the same, they are such a release and guess what today is a new day, No worries, God has your best at heart - and you cant even imagine what the future has instore, have faith, even when you think "how is this ever gonna be the same, be beter, work out, gonna work, how can I afford.....stop. Just trust in HIM, trust me, he finds a way - he really does.....Always looking forward to the next share and hug you give to the is a good day! Be thankful - I am thankful for finding your blog

Fatima said...

Sweet Kandee,

My heart melted to hear how much pain you are in. I wish this accident never happened with you. All I can I do is pray for you to face this difficult situation in your life with enduring courage.

I myself I been going through a hard patch for the passed 4 years and it seems there is no end to my misery. However, I know that there is a higher being who would never give us more than we can handle - and one day everything will be A OK!

Wish you a speedy recovery and sending you lots of love and warm sentiments.

Your friend,

Fatima E

Anonymous said...

Kandee, I pray that even though hurtful words touch your ears, that they never,ever settle in your heart. For that is a place filled with such radiant love and light that darkness dare not go. You are a gift from God, beautifully and wonderfully made. Thank you for sharing your amazing heart with us all.

EmmyLouiseClaire said...

The video made me cry! He is so inspirational, just like you! I don't have any words to use to describe how i feel right now.
Thank you! (:

PersianCat said...

there's always sunshine after the rain!! =) ...hope things start to look up for you again and soon!!

purpleisbliss said...

Nick came to my school and spoke a few weeks ago! It was really life-changing! Glad you posted a video on him.

Skater Girl said...

I hope you get well soon Kandee..
I cried myself to sleep too once awhile..

Anyway, be safe and hope you feels better..


AmélieC. said...

so touched...and that man is also so inspiring. I've battled depression and low self esteem from abuse most of my life. I have my poetry site... it helps to share. And this is what you're doing Kandee...and this man to. I understand the need to show others that they are not's not for pity, it's to share and relate and to hopefully give hope. It gives the dark and tough times a reason and purpose towards good. At times though, I cannot write or even think thoughts...because I'm trying to block out the emotion somehow and feel too much... and I feel so blocked and can't think it helps to read how others are dealing with tough times. Thank you Kandee. Beauty and goodness won't be silenced for long, it always manages to squeeze through the pavement... and one I still have hope in that I will bud and become like a flower...and never feel guilt or shame for having felt sadness and for suffering with depression. It's just something I had to live through and I may struggle with it for the rest of my life. But I am an artist and singer song writer and although right now I am a dry well... my bathtub of tears WILL one day overflow into a song or a painting.
<3 Thanks dear Kandee!

Daienna said...

i <3 you kandee.
i have nights like that every night.
don't know why. but i do.
hope your nights get better

Unknown said...

I loved the video, what a wonderful man! And yes, EVERYONE in this world has cried themselves to sleep... and though it's so painful at the beginning, you're right... it's like God's way of getting a little bit of stress and sadness out of our hearts. You are amazing Kandee!
~Cassidy Z.

Kelly said...

Wow, that video really puts things in perspective. Very moving. He is dead on: we need to be thankful for what we DO HAVE. I get lost in self-pity mode time and time again and this is the exact swift kick in the arse I needed. Thank you for sharing, Kandee!

Mazie said...

I truly believe by the grace of God, you posted this blog today. I have been crying myself to sleep every night thinking about how I am never good enough. That video made me cry, just to hear someone telling girls that they are gorgeous just the way they are. God bless you Kandee, I am praying for your leg!

Rebecca said...

We have watched that guys videos at my church.He is an amazing person.I will keep you and your pain in my prayers Kandee.Have blessed dreams full of cupcakes.:)


I can't tell you enough Kandee how much your strengths are now becoming my strengths.
I love you so much... and you Help many more people than you Realize.
You are one of the strongest women I have ever met (even if it is thru just watching your videos and reading your blogs)
Youve helped me in so many more ways than you can imagine... and Im sure Im not the only one...
We love you Kandee(:
so very very much... and I hope your leg feels better... *kisses*

LandOfLeah said...

Awe Kandee I'm sorry you were having a sad night. Every now and then people just need to cry and I always feel better afterwards so I really hope that you did too! I loved the video, I have seen it before but no matter how many times you watch it, it makes you really think.

I really hope your leg feels better soon! It's definitely not something that needed to happen to such a wonderful person like you!

xo, leah-arlette

Unknown said...

Thank you for posting this video!
I wish everyone would take the time to watch it.
It makes you feel truly blessed for what God has given you.
People choose to make fun of others for what they look like on the outside, not caring that an amazing person could be on the inside.
They think that it's just a joke to laugh at others for their disabilities, weight, height, looks, the way someone can find joy in anything brought their way, and so many other things, and they don't stop to think how it really can affect others emotionally.
This video is powerful but it's so amazing to see how happy he is for what God gave him and how he can still do many of the things he wants to do.
It makes you see how others can have it worse than you and still smile.
It's truly inspirational to see.

I hope you get to feeling better Kandee!

God Bless all!
Cassidy E.

KB said...

You stay true to your name, you are as sweet as Kandee! You've got to be one of the most caring, inspirational and talented people who could ever call themselves a role model. You make me and everyone else who needs a little boost in their day feel like there is hope in the world. That there are more people like you out there to care about us. You are a role model to me and so many other girls, and I appreciate it, because you're a strong talented woman who deserves to be called a role model. Love you Kandee! Never stop being the way you are because if the day ever comes that you do, the world will lose a little of it's sunshine <3 !! :]

SANJA said...

Dearest Kandee,
yes,some nights are harder than the others; sometimes we feel like we are drowning in sorrow, but when the sun rises an the new day greets us,we see things from a different perspective and our strength somehow comes back giving us the will and the power to go on.Don't worry, we are all only human and crying ourselves to sleep is bound to happen even to the best of us. But, please, just know that we are here, we love you, we wish we could hug you and tell you that everything is going to be OK. You are in our hearts, sweetie. So, don't worry, everything WILL be alright!

Unknown said...

I am spending a year away from home in Germany with only my family as the people I know. There have been so many nights where I have cried myself to sleep, it is hard to count them. Crying is the most natural thing a human can do and if you keep it inside, the 'heart-tub' explodes. But times get better and worse, and however hard things get, you just need to count the wonderful things that can happen. I am now finding it hard to leave Germany and can't imagine why I thought it was awful. Love is all you need.

Unknown said...

hey Kandee, i know hows to sleep crying , and i know the pain your going through is unbelievable, you are such a great person full of qualities, dont let mean comments hurt you and dont let them go to ur heart. Trust in god, he will make things better for you. You know u have the support of all your followers/fans. and as someone already said THANKS because everyday you give hope to those that in hard moments are giving up! you are such an inspiration. God bless you ..


Lovinmamabear said...

Kandee, I hope you feel better real soon! God doesn't give us more than we can handle. Going through pain, and suffering can only make us stronger. I am glad that you can still be grateful and thankful, because there are so many things in this world to smile about :)

hindadib said...

Kandee! Your words really lift me up! Last week, I would cry myself to sleep every night! I didn't know why. Every negative thing seemed to flash in my head all at once! Time, changes, aging, death, losing my closest people, all those things just wont seem to get out of my thoughts! Time really scares me and it really makes me sad to imagine how life would be without my family! But then I think again and notice that they are still with me now, we are all living and breathing! Why am I getting sad about the future, we dont know what it holds for us! So we should just enjoy life together as long as it lasts!

Thank you. For brightening some of my darkest days!
I sound very cheesy but I felt like opening up! hehe!

PS. your scar looks like the nike sign hahah!
I crashed into a glass door when I was 3, I stil have a little scar on my forehead!!
And I have a scar on my neck from a ''plastic'' surgery to remove a mole! If your scar itches, itch it with feathers haha!

Much much love to you and your little poeple!

Get well soon <3

Hind Adib

Gesselly said...

I thank you for sharing this video. It really warms my heart to know that there are people out there who have struggled and are just letting you know it'll be okay. Thanks Kandee!

Anonymous said...

i love him. my mom sent me a link to watch one of his videos the other day. seriously inspiring.

i'm glad you were able to cry yourself to sleep last night. i rarely get that opportunity. crying relieves so much and is so healthy for you. even though sometimes it's hard to do.

Relocin said...

Thank you for sharing this video. I hope everyone that watches it re-posts it. This message needs to be passed along.

As for those people who think you just want sympathy... don't even bother with them!
It's human nature. Go ahead and shed some tears because it is a release... It's not good to keep everything shut up inside otherwise all the negative things will build up inside and you become bitter and hateful.

So I say let it out! Cry, rant, blow of steam somehow just to release the negative and be refreshed!

Anonymous said...

honey kandee, thanks for the words, it means a lot to me, since i am going through a tough time, thanks !!! lots of love :-*

Anonymous said...

That video really was amazing.

I love your blog Kandee, and I want you to know that I pray for you!

Kimmy BabyCakes said...

Hi Kandee I know exactly how it feels to cry yourself to sleep, I've been doing it for 5 months ever since my traumatic accident. You probably won't even get a chance to read this but I appreciate all of your words. Im learning to walk again and getting out of my wheelchair. It's a huge, huge, accomplishment for me. I too will probably need plastic surgery for my scar on my hips and legs. Everytime I get sad though I think about how much worse it could be. That car that hit me could have killed me but Im still alive! Anyways as you recover, I will recover with you. Thanks!
kim v

Law1sfab said...

This is a great post, I have seen this guy before and he is just toooo inspiring. I really hope you feel better soon and that your leg heal's nicely. Hope your princess (so cute) had a good day and just stay strong. Big hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Unknown said...

Sweetie you are often in my prayers and I hope your legs gets well soon! Lots of love of you dutch cupcake friend. Loyoya xxx

Lindsay said...

Kandee you are just one of the sweetest people ever you always think of so many people above yourself. I feel terrible about all your pains and troubles especially your leg =( I hope it heals quickly and the pain goes away even sooner.

I do have a makeup question I wanted to ask too though if you have a spare minute.... I used to love my MAC Studio Tech makeup but since I moved the closest MAC location is over an hour away and well I know my skin tone has I have found revlons photoready foundation and love it! but i NEED an undereye concealer that covers well but wont crease in my lil wrinklies....I am 25 and i have wrinklies under my eyes already and they make me look much older I HATE it! and I have tried concealers from all the drug store brands and none of them fill the creases in and hide them so who has the best concealer for fine lines under the eyes even if i have to special order it and wait for it to come in the mail I really need something that will work

Kristina said...

I am so sorry you feel so bad! Take all the time off you need. We will all be here waiting for you! Just relax and heal that leg! It's great you have your boyfriend to help you. Meditating can help the pain too. Do whatever you need, girl! We all love you and want you to have all the happiness you deserve! Just relax for now, if you can! You are in our thoughts and prayers.

xoxooxoxo Kika

Yougethepicture said...

Aggy: I feel the same lately. And I had one of those nights last night.

Unknown said...

about two years ago, I went to rescue my little sister from a very abusive reltionship. I went there by car and was the passanger. I arrived and hugged her and my 3 little nieces. I helped her packed her stuff into a moving truck and just when we were almost ready to leave, my sis significan other showed up and things just went wrong. We managed to get in the car and drive off when the driver saw my sister's boyfriend folowing us in a motorcycle. The driver lost control of the car and crashed into a tree. I woke up in a rural care center in South America. I couldnt move my arm. My right eye felt like it had sand in it and I was severly drugged. Next, I found my brother by my side telling me he would take me to Aruba and from there I would be transported to Mount Sinai in New York city. Once I was stabilized my brother called from Venezuela and said: "you are now safe and in good hands" "dont worry about your recovery, but I must tell you something" my heart stopped and I listened, then he continued " Our siter was killed and so was one of our nieces"
So, you see Kandee I understand when you talk about crying yourself to sleep. I understand what is like to have the tub full and overflow.
I am still recovering. I had 15 pieces of glass in my right eye and severe cuts in my face. I had a broken humerus with severe skin loss in my forearm. I lost a tendon to my thumb, but Today there is no greater pain than not having my little girls. SO give yourself permision to cry and cry outloud for no one understands your pain better than you.
We are strong.

Anonymous said...

WOW I cried watching this!!! It is funny how we can let the little things matter soooo much! impressive video!
Thanks for sharing prayers are still with you!

Marly said...

Not only do we get an inspiring blog, but we also get an inspiring video too. This has lifted my heart. I hope you're doing ok Kandee. I can't wait for the day that you no longer have to feel pain in your leg. Keep your head up. You're so strong. We're all here for you(:

sarad4 said...

You always post the perfect things at the perfect time. I needed this today.

And that guy is amazing. I saw him in a short film called the Butterfly Circus with one of my favorite actors Doug Jones. Check it out:

Anonymous said...

Hi Kandee,
You have one of the biggest hearts I know. (Well, I wish I knew you personally but I don't.)
I know how it feels to have ligaments hurt! lol. Just keep it rested and hopefully those leggings you are wearing are too tight! Remember: R.I.C.E !

Anonymous said...

Thanks kandee, you're so inspirational and your words are just beyond moving. Love ya! Hope everything works out for you and that you're leg and everything stops hurting! *hugs*

niea999 said...

sometimes we are sooo sad, and for a so long time, that we can't even cry..
this is so painful ! it''s worth !
Now you cried, you may feel a little better (forgeting the pain that's still here, o/c..)
we almost ALL hope you'll feel better now ! and for the others ? don't give a **** to them, they are just meannnnn people !
(sorry for my bad english and this is morning here.. easy BAD words came to my mind ! not good.. u_u I'm working on it)

Anonymous said...


I am crying while reading this right now. You have been such an inspiration to not just me, many other girls / boys around the world. I would give you so much hugs right now ( if I could ) and tell you that everything will be okay and I have been in that same situation with stitches. Every time I read one of you blog posts, you light up my day ( when it is not sad. ) Just think, you have all of your wonderful friends / fans to support you through your journey.

Much love,

April said...

what an amazing video. Thanks for posting. Hope you get to feeling better soon.

taraaa said...

I saw Nick a few years ago. I have never been so touched before, he is ao amazing. Omg, I wish you could meet the man, Kandee. He is such a beautiful person. I tried not to cry the whole time he was talking but then he gave me a hug and that was it, I cried for the rest of the day haha. Words can't even begin to describe how amazing he is.

SANJA said...

Nick Vujicic is a true inspiration. I am sure that his story will make everyone take a second look at what they have and see the life from a different perspective. I am honored to be the same nationality as him-Serbian! Thanks for sharing Nick's story with everyone, Kandee!
Love you

Anonymous said...

Thank you so much Kandee, You are amazing, it is so good to see that someone who is happy and bubbly can still have the down days. It makes me realize that it doesn't matter how perfect my life gets i am allowed a night where i cry myself to sleep and not feel guilty because i have nothing to cry about! Thank you for sharing your life with us!!

SuziQ said...

God bless you Kandee, may you heal quickly and forget the pain even sooner.
Thank you for everything you do.
SB :)

Anonymous said...

Love this video and you right this is a very beautiful video
I don't now what happened yet with your leg but please get well soon ok love your videos too there so amazing love you so so so much take care. ( presiosa )

Tiahna said...

thank you kandee for posting that. ive never heard about nick before...but i am so greatful that i have now...i needed that, it brought me a little close to God. i love you and thank you everyday for being an amazing person.!!

LaMiezée said...

Thank you Kandee..
Now I know that I'm not the only one who cried this night..
I love your posts, they give me so much.


award said...

Sometimes things are so hard... i love reading your blog entries... they give me hope if anything and don't make me feel bad for being so sad sometimes. i had one of those nights tonight... just so much to do and i don't know anymore. at least ur there. best love kandee

Liz said...

Kandee- We saw him in person about a year ago and he was amazing, thank you for posting this. we sometimes foregt what we have right in front of us. You are so great! And to let you know, everything is going to be ok, God has great plans for you and everyone, and you are already fullfilling so many things with this blog alone. Thank You! :)

Maria said...

I dont know what else to say then

i love you kandee! ( ;

i love what you do, your fantastic personality, your 'high on life' and thats why i think it was so bad for you that you got hurted!

I read your blog everyday and kandee...

i love you<3 for all what you do( ;

i hope i will be like you and sooo happy and high on life when i grow up ; ) !

I hope you will soon become completely well again (:

Shelby Renae said...

Thank you so much, Kandee! You always seem to know what to say at the exact moment I need it. This blog entry hit home more than the others because I'm definitely no stranger when it comes to crying myself to sleep. Just last night I sat in bed crying from all the stress and worries going on in my life right now. It's hard keeping it together around family and friends when deep down, all you want to do is cry and be held and told that everything's going to be okay. Sometimes I just want to stand up in a crowded room and scream, "Guess what? I'm not perfect! I don't have it all together like you think I do. I'm tired of having no one to turn to. I'm tired of smiling when all I want to do is scream on the top of my lungs. I'm tired of this void in my heart not being fixed." Life is frustrating and can make you bitter, but it's people like you who keep my heart from turning to stone. That may sound extremely corny, but it's so true, Kandee! You truly are a blessing. Your blog has made me cry and laugh and smile when all I want to do is bottle up my emotions and pretend my life is great. Sorry for the ramble, but I had to thank you again for being so honest yet optimistic. I hope you have a super fast recovery and a day full of sunshine and cupcakes! Sending you lots of love! ♥

Melissa said...

Hey Kandee! My mother always told me that God gave you tears to wash away the pain in order to see clearly and feel better after. So next time you cry just tell yourself that it's okay because after you will feel better and maybe you will understand things better! Lots of love and hugs!!

Sara said...

That was one of the best videos I have ever seen! Its amazing how people who are perfectly healthy complain about how they don't have anything, and then there are people like this who have no arms and no legs and they are so positive and
thankful for what they have.

I wish more people were like this and i wish i could be more like this sometimes aswell.

You are so positive Kandee and keep your head up, your leg hurts now but soon you will feel so much better.

Take care! :)
sara! from Canada

Unknown said...

nick vuijicic! he visited hawaii and i got to hear him speak about his journey with Christ. it was sooo inspirational and i got to hear him speak at one of my darkest moments, too! so it was a real blessing [: i hope your days and nights get better hun. know that God is watching over you and holding you, too while you fall asleep. whenever i cry myself to sleep i imagine me in His arms and it puts me to sleep so comfortably [: you're in His arms too. love you!

Anonymous said...

Hi Kandee! Thanks for posting this video on your blog and letting me know that there are so many amazing people on this planet!

Here is a video I made for you
Hope it will cheer you up :)


Diane said...

Thanks you for these kinds words, Kandee, hope you are ok now. Today was my birthday and I feel so lucky to be loved!

have a great day!


Tara said...

Sweet Kandee, I just want you to know that you are such an inspiration to me. I've had a "crying myself to sleep" night recently. I watched that video and was so encouraged. Please know that you're not alone and we're all praying for you and love you!

Hugs, Tara

andi said...

We love you Kandee! Keep on going and staying positive! I'm always so excited to read your blog! Just remember your leg will heal and you'll get through the pain! I've doubted the power of God many times, but when I read your blog, I get a chance to see what God can do in a life and it empowers me! Thank you so much for who you are!

Anonymous said...

this is a favourite poem of mine i wanted to share.

by Robert G. Ingersoll

My creed:
To love justice, to long for the right,
to love mercy,
to pity the suffering, to assist the weak,

to forget wrongs and remember benefits,
to love the truth, to be sincere,
to utter honest words, to love liberty,
to wage relentless war
against slavery in all its forms,

to love family and friend,
to make a happy home,
to love the beautiful in art, in nature,
to cultivate the mind,
to be familiar with the mighty thoughts
that genius has expressed,
the noble deeds of all the world;

to cultivate courage and cheerfulness,
to make others happy,
to fill life with the splendor of generous acts,
the warmth of loving words;

to discard error, to destroy prejudice,
to receive new truths with gladness,
to cultivate hope,
to see the calm beyond the storm,
the dawn beyond the night,
to do the best that can be done
and then be resigned.

This is the religion of reason,
the creed of science.
This satisfies the brain and the heart.

Kate Buhler said...

Kandee, As a massage therapist, I would like to put it out there that Manual Lymphatic Drainage may help your leg. It is very light and very relaxing work that can help reduce your swelling as well as reduce scarring. Just a suggestion. I'm thinking about you and hoping for a quick recovery!

Nikki said...

You are such a beautiful person, inside and out. You are an inspiration to me in more ways then one. I'm trying my best to stay positive in life and to always make others smile, as well as myself. Thank you for being you!

Unknown said...

Omg!! Kandee you need to come see him speak this Friday the 7th @ 7pm in Pasadena, CA. He's going to be at our church, u get to meet him. Children and adults are more than welcome to. You have to come to support.

Miss Vendella said...

i don't usually write comments, even though i am a blogger as
but i must say this-you are inspirational in your own way. I love watching you on you tube, because you make me smile. I love reading your stories, because i know how you feel. Thank you for sharing and bringing smile to my face!

You are beautiful inside and out!

Cluttered Mom said...

I have just recently found your blog. I read the post about people thinking you want sympathy. Just from what I read... and I do not know you... you do not strike me as a woman that wants sympathy. I think you are someone that takes on life and only cry when you can not take anymore. As someone with MS, there are days that only a good cry can relieve the pressures and the pain. So, to those that make these tacky comments to you I would say to them... Deal with your own life and quit reading about mine if you have nothing nice to say. You are a beautiful woman on the outside and seem doubly beautiful on the inside. Thank you for helping us "average girls" feel look more beautufil with all your tips and tricks. And for being such an inspiration.

LuciaLife said...

Thank you for bringing this up kandee i cried to it, the moment he said " its scary to know how many girls feel liek they're worth nothing" ive been going thru stuff i cant tell anyone about because i know they horrible way they'll react. thanks kandee! hope you get better soon xxxx

Zizzi said...

Thank you sweet Kandee! I really really really needed this today!

locochauncy said...

This guy is truely amazing! I got the chance to meet him when he came to visit my church a few months ago, no matter what he says he'll bring you to tears hes amazing!

locochauncy said...

This guy is truely amazing! I got the chance to meet him when he came to visit my church a few months ago, no matter what he says he'll bring you to tears hes amazing!

Angie said...

How foolish have I been?! VERY!! Tears wouldn't stop coming down when I saw this. Thank you Thank you Thank you Kandeee

tirasdepapel said...

OMG... with people like him we can see how is life to others... WE HAVE EVERYTHING TO BE HAPPY... why we are not?

cindy scissorhands said...

Thank you so much for this. <3

Call me what you will, but most call me Nikki said...

This was so powerful. He is amazing. I really, really need those words :) I thank you, from the both of my <3

Anonymous said...

i cried yesterday because the guy i was having a relationship left me..i couldnt be angry with him cause it was for his mother he was leaving....i cried on my pillow , i cried hard holding my hands hoping trow i would feel nothing....i come to you blog to see some make-up tips jus to make me feel better..and hey i saw this ive stop crying ..y should i when this man had shown me how im so complete with everything and i have no reason to don have any idea how you have made my day and changed the way i think time i wanna cry i will think of him ..
kandee: i pray you never cry...for its you who had made soo many happy....

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