Saturday, December 24, 2011

5 Ways To Survive Christmas

(yes that was me in high school....many, many Christmas mornings, ago)


Sometimes the holidays are not as fun as they are for everyone else...

*Maybe the holidays bring memories of hurt or sadness.

*Maybe it isn't a happy time because we don't have a loved one with us.

*Maybe certain members of our family have a way of stealing all our happiness and ruining the "happy holiday spirit"!

*Maybe finances are making it feel like Christmas isn't as fun because we can't afford to get everyone the presents we like.

Here's 5 ways to help make it through the holidays if you are dealing with any of those things:

#1. Sad Holidays-
The holidays aren't always everyone's favorite time of year. Sometimes they come with a lot of memories of hurt or sadness. Maybe something that wasn't very good happened at Christmas time, and it has felt like it's ruined it for you. But, sometimes that is exactly the time to make new memories- time to forget what is behind us, and make new memories for the future. I have memories of holiday times when things were not very good and full of hurt and sadness...but just like the bigger picture of life- I'm not going to let the "poop in the past" , stink up my future! Make some new memories, wash the dirty ol' sad memories out of the memory laundry and get ready for some fresh new memories. If you keep focusing in the pain in your past, you'll never enjoy the gift of joy that is waiting for you right now.

#2. Missing Someone-
This Christmas makes my heart a little  because someone in our family is not with us.
And as much fun (or not fun if you have a difficult family member) as it is to be with loved ones, sometimes, for many reasons we don't have them with us.
And then I remember, Christmas is to celebrate the one who was born, who can comfort us, strengthen us, and bring great joy into our hearts, Jesus. God knows all the hurts in our our hearts, and sometimes when there is not comfort left on Earth, we might look to the comfort and love that God can give that is like nothing else we can ever, find, buy, or person we can be with.
I have been alone on holidays...and sometimes what helped me was telling myself, "this will make a funny story in the future! My little holiday I spent alone!" and "Next year I'm gonna' make it times better than this year!"
The memories of that person lives on in our hearts and we can take the joy that they gave us, and let in live in our hearts for them. They would want us to be happy and have a good time in their memory, I'm sure.

#3. And then maybe you wish a certain family member wouldn't show up!
I think everyone has at least one family member that you wish would decide not to come to all your family gatherings!
That one (or maybe more) person, who has a way of hurting your feelings, being annoying or rude, says things that no one should say, has hurt you in the past...you get the idea and you're probably already visualizing that person in your head!
I have these people in my family. They make me worried that at any moment they are going to switch from being nice, to saying someone that will hurt my feelings. And others that have behavior that is just embarrassing or rude!
All you can do is: prepare for them in  your mind! Be prepared to let things they say roll off your back..not hurt you. Don't let them steal your joy, make you feel bad, worthless, or embarrassed. Treat them like an annoying sound you might hear- just ignore it and keep on doing what you're doing! The greatest  way to deal with awful people or family is to ignore them! And know that I love you- I think you're awesome..and I'm sending you extra hugs and love to know you're not alone in dealing with difficult family members...I'm preparing to deal with some of mine as we speak! ha ha ha

#4. Hey, where's my millions at? Finances took a holiday too... 
Sometimes due to a diet that our money has gone on, and forgot to tell us...or loss of a job...and kind of loss of money...it can make us feel like we can't have a fun Christmas. Can't give the gifts we want, but Christmas, at the very core- without all the presents, Christmas parties (which I didn't go to any), big dinners...but mostly lack of being able to afford presents...makes us feel bad.
I know...as I said in my recent, present wrapping video, once when I was a young married couple, and Jordan was a baby, we didn't have enough to buy a tree. So i cut out a tree shaped piece of cardboard from  a box and taped it to the wall. It was cute and very artsy! ha ha
Another year, to save money on tree decorations...we strung real popcorn onto string with a needle...and you know, it was so cute!
Another year when money was tight, instead of a gift we gave coupons for things like: FREE FOOT MASSAGE, I'LL COOK YOU DINNER, I'LL WASH YOUR CAR, FREE HUGS (even though that's a regular thing)....
and the best part is you can make it through anything, saying: "we're gonna make next year even better!"...and you better believe it!
God gave us the greatest gift in the world, his son, Jesus. To save our hearts and to help us make it through in anything, with him in our lives and joy in our hearts.

#5. Last but not least...Here's how to make your Christmas great no matter what:
*make a yummy cup of hot chocolate with whipped cream
*think back to your favorite Christmas memory and how excited you were as a kid
*know that next year, you have no idea how much more amazing and better it might be
*curl up with your hot chocolate and a blanket and watch your favorite old holiday movie, like Miracle on 34th Street (cool fact, Ben Nye did that make-up for that movie- I still love his make-up and got to tour their factory last year!)
*burn a yummy holiday smelling candle
*enjoy all the little cozy decorations you might have put up, even if it was just a cardboard tree cut out!
*and if you can help anyone bring a little joy into their lives, that is truly the best way to celebrate...

Merry Christmas to everyone....my hugs are free and so is the love I've sending to you....
May God fill you each with love overflowing...and my joy dance in your hearts no matter what you may be dealing with, going through, or who you have to deal with this holiday time!

Extra hugs today and mugs full of yummy hot chocolate! I love you all..so dearly, your kandee

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10 comments:

paige said...

Kandee you are such an angel. Dont ever let any rude comments bring you down bc youre truly a great person.

Anonymous said...

Heyy kandee i just want to say i really love your blog and i pray and wish god helps you in every step of the way, you are soo inspiring to me. Everytime i feel really down i just read your blog and watch your videos, you are so lively please stay like this foreverrr!!!

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas Kandee. Thanks for being such a positive and inspiring person. Sending you hugs as well ~Amanda~

Anonymous said...

Kandee you made my day/ Christmas 10x brighter... Thank you for letting me join ur kandee family <3

Anonymous said...

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SAYING ALL THIS.. IT REALLY DID MAKE ME FEEL BETTER.. IT GOT ME TEARY EYED BUT MADE ME FEEL HAPPY.. THANK U SOOOOO MUCH FOR BEING SO KIND.. MERRY CHRISTMAS <3

Kristy said...

Kandee.thank you. Merry Christmas..have a great one. Yiu always make me smile

Anonymous said...

Thanks kandee! Merry christmas! Some of the people in my family apparently got upset that they didn't get things on their wishlist like others did but i mean christmas is about the birth of jesus and giving right? I thought it was rude and kind of mean. If you don't like your present can you at least pretend and complain at home? not everyone got what they wanted! *SIGH* Some people just have to ruin it for others. Anyway God bless. And I hope it's a magical christmas for you and your kids :)

Anonymous said...

Merry Christmas ! May you have one filled with joy and laughter with your beautiful children ! Hopfully Santa brings you everything you want because you definitely deserve it ! ;)

AHBrowne @ ahbrowne.com said...

Merry Christmas to you too! I love that we have such similar views. Im much like you when I talk to people and some just don't get it. You remind me that it's okay to be that way! So thank you :)
Lots of hugs!!

Anonymous said...

Kandee,
I know I'm not a regular on here but I do get your post and I'm going through a lot now first my aunt passed away two weeks ago and its been tough to get through. Second I'm going to be expecting my first child next april and I was so excited to tell my family about it but a few didn't share my same excitement and it hurt more than anything. Your words really touched me and even though we've never met I feel like you were speaking to me. I hope you have a merry Christmas and god bless you and your family.

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